THE TIER LIST – VIDEO GAMES

Posted: February 3, 2012 by kingofgob in General

Hey guys.  I know it’s been a long time since I wrote an article, but blame bioware for consuming all of my free time by releasing an mmo with Twi’leks.  Anyway, since I don’t really play LoL all that much anymore I started thinking about how I could contribute to the site without actually having to play LoL.  So I sat down an thought about our audience.  That’s right I actually was thinking about you guys.  What do I know about the NoELO community?  I know they like LoL, so they probably like other video games as well.  They visit NoELO, so they probably visit other video game sites.  Hmm what do people who like video games and visit video game websites like?  TIER LISTS!  I know some of you may despise tier lists because they represent an innate imbalance in games, but I’m going to do something a little more fun.  Instead of looking at champions in LoL or characters in SSBM I’m going to look at more generic areas.  This week I’m going to start big and hope I get the rage flowing fast, because we’re looking at the video game tier list.  

GOD TIER: 

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, Super Mario Brothers 3, Super Mario 64

These games are the untouchables.  If you disagree that these belong here you are plain wrong; please feel free to call be an idiot in the comments and I will feel free to never listen to a word you have to say again.  If you bring up nostalgia as a means to belittle these titles just go try playing one of them yourself right now and we’ll see you after your inevitable three day hiatus from existence while you’re busy playing.  These games are such popular choices for favorite video game that many people will just throw these out and come up with something from one of the next list as their favorite.

THE NEXT TIER:

Enter your favorite game here

Yes, that game is good (unless you have really poor taste).  No it’s not as good as the God Tier as much as you want to debate me it is.

NOSTALGIA TIER:

Goldeneye 007, Grand Theft Auto III, Hitman

Go play them.  They’re not at all how you remember.

ZOMG TIER:

Final Fantasy VII, Earthbound, Chrono Trigger, Metroid

These are the games that you know you can’t bring up to you’re one friend because he will shriek in excitement while he reminisces about playing this game.

INDIE TIER:

Braid, Bastion, Limbo

If you say these are you favorite games go smoke some more pot you hippie.  They’re good not the best ever.

SOLID TIER:

Tetris, PacMan, Pokemon

These are the games everyone has played but it’s hard to put them in your list of favorite games for one reason or another.  And  if you really think Tetris is the best game of all time because it’s the most played game ever, then I guess McDonald’s  has the best burger of all time because they have the most sold.

Bad Rap Tier:

Call of Duty IV: Modern Warfare

People like to use Modern Warfare like it’s a curse word in the gaming community but this one doesn’t deserve it.  If you want to list it in your top ten favorite games or something I will allow it, but only if you list it as Call of Duty IV and leave out the subtitle.

IF THIS IS YOUR FAVORITE GAME I HATE YOU TIER:

Modern Warfare II/III, Grand Theft Auto IV

Do I need to explain this one?

 

So please feel free to rage in the comments below or email me at KingofGob@gmail.com with your hate mail.

 

Comments
  1. Capac Amaru says:

    No rage, just my version.

    GOD TIER:

    Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, Super Mario Brothers 3, Yoshi’s Island, Final Fantasy VII, Portal, F-Zero GX, Eternal Darkness

    NOSTALGIA TIER:

    Mariokart 64, Goldeneye 007, TMNT (NES), Half-Life, Unreal Tournament

    ZOMG TIER:

    Minecraft

    INDIE TIER:

    Canabalt

    SOLID TIER:

    Tetris, Pokemon

    BAD RAP TIER:

    Too Human

    IF THIS IS YOUR FAVORITE GAME I HATE YOU TIER:

    Halo multiplayer, Skyrim (purely for quote and reference spam)

    • kingofgob says:

      Funny you say skyrim because of the joke because I almost put portal in that tier for the cake is a lie. I just couldn’t bring myself to do that to an otherwize stellar game.

      • Capac Amaru says:

        I found the cake being a lie much more tolerable and interesting before I played portal than all these arrow to the knee jokes

  2. nmTd[ says:

    Super Mario 64 was an overrated* game; Galaxy 1/2 are better in every conceivable way (aside from nostalgia, which it will have going for it in a few years anyways). Same thing with Oot compared to Majora’s Mask, as well as SMB3 compared to Super Mario World.

    * – Overrated does not mean ‘bad’.

  3. Capac Amaru says:

    Those are all really bad examples. Super Mario 64 MADE the 3d platforming genre. OoT established the 3rd person targetting system, and SMB3 pioneered the overworld map for platforming games.

    These games can’t be over-rated, because they all had a massive impact on their respective genres.

    Ocarina of Time stands the test of time better than the other two (with a little help from its shiny new portable remake), and I much prefer SMB3 to Super Mario World, although its tied for my favourite in the series with Yoshi’s Island.

    • nmTd[ says:

      They can’t be overrated because they made a massive impact? No, that’s the exact reason WHY they’re overrated. They are all good game. Hell, they’re all spectacular games (by critical standards; my personal opinion on them is a bit different), but none of them deserve the entirety of the cult-like worship and praise that they have shoved onto them, especially when that worship blinds them to the achievements of other games in the series. People tend to confuse innovation with quality when they truly have naught to do with each other. A game can be innovative and boring (Brink’s parkour system springs to mind) just as easily as it can be great and introduce absolutely nothing new (Nintendo’s specialty.)

      I also wholly disagree with OoT withstanding the test of time best of the three. That honor goes to SMB3. In general, 2D games age more gracefully than 3D, especially when the games in question are essentially prototypes of the original 3D technology. I’d go so far as to say most N64 games in general are damn near unbearable to play in the modern age.

  4. Rothmog says:

    No love for PC titles? Civ, Diablo, Age of Empires, Baulder’s Gate?

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